Wednesday, April 28, 2010

It was a Dark and Stormy Night...

When you’re writing a novel, you want that first line to grab the reader by the balls, er, the throat, and not let go. I thought it would be fun to collect a few of folks’ favorite first lines, either of their own or by authors they admire. Below is a collection of some pretty terrific opening lines. If you have a few of your own, feel free to post them in the comments.
I’ll open with two of mine:

“I’m bored. Whose life can we destroy today?”
Wicked Hearts by Claire Thompson
Brendan stood like the perfect wet dream beneath the spray, his erect cock clutched in his hand.
Polar Reaction by Claire Thompson
From Readers:

Contributed by Lloyd Meeker
"For numberless years a myna had astounded travelers to the caravansary
with its ability to spew indecencies in ten languages, and before the
fight broke out everyone assumed the old blue-tongued devil on its perch
by the fireplace was the one who maligned the giant African with such
foulness and verve."
Gentlemen of the Road by Michael Chabon 

Contributed by Laura Flocker:
It began, as a lot of things do, in bed.
Dark Tides by Josh Lanyon

Contributed by Jean Paquin
(Note: The speaker is a parrot) 
"Oooh, baby.  Luscious Lips.  Wanna gimme some head, sweetcheeks?"
Outback Meltdown by Alexis Fleming

Contributed by Alan H Chin:
Ennis Del Mar wakes before five, wind rocking the trailer, hissing in around the aluminum door and window frames. The shirts hanging on a nail shudder slightly in the draft.
Brokeback Mountain by Annie Proulx

From Authors – Their Own Personal Favorites

In the deserted men’s restroom at the back of Middleton Community College, Sam Keller knelt on the tile, braced his hands against Keith Jameson’s thighs, and broke his mother’s heart.
Special Delivery by Heidi Cullinan
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Dominic Mackenzie turned into the rest area parking lot, his dick hardening in sight of the squat brick building located directly off the interstate outside of his hometown. Other than the closet, there was no gay scene in Smithville.
Tempestuous Relations by Amanda Young
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No one can hear the screams, the cries for mercy, and the shrieks of agony.
In the Blood by Rick Reed
A vampire walked into a bar.
Stefan's Salvation by NJ Walters

The night had turned cold while they were in the Brig, one of Chicago’s oldest and most infamous leather establishments.
Bashed by Rick Reed
Men suck.
Christina's Tapestry by NJ Walters

It was the screams that woke him.
Craving Candy by NJ Walters

His brother had thought Hell a fiery abyss, but Nicolas Montfaucon knew better. It was wet, smelled like a sewer, and sounded like the rush of collective hopes draining toward the sea.
Seduced by Darkness by Delilah Devlin

My cat started acting deranged, could it be cuz her diet I changed?
Men at Work by Robin Glasser
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There is blood on my hands.
Face Without a Heart by Rick Reed
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There’s no place like home. The police substation didn’t sit at the end of the rainbow or anywhere near Kansas, but for some reason that stupid phrase ran like a mantra through Sinead O’Rourke’s head as she drew a deep breath and pushed through the double-doors leading into the station house. 
Sin’s Gift by Delilah Devlin

Without money for a cab or the gonads to hitchhike, what should have been a fifteen-minute drive to the countryside took Declan Mayo almost two hours by foot.
Chicken Ranch: Hunger by Amanda Young
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I just wanted a hot meal and hotter bathwater.
Tengo una Pistola (Cocked & Fully Loaded Anthology) by Bryl R. Tyne
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New York City and it's pouring, which means no taxis in New Yorkese.
My Life as a Concubine by Robin Glasser

I awoke one morning from uneasy dreams to find my penis had transformed itself into a vagina.
Man-Amorphosis by Rick Reed
Death didn't have to be easy, but couldn't it be a little cheaper?
Hacking Immortality by Maura Anderson
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What are some of your favorites? Let us know in the comments!


  1. These are just great!! Sorry I missed giving you mine, my bad!

  2. Hello!!!! how you doing!?
    i found your blog very interesting and well done let me tell you,
    it's amazing how you write about that kind of things, can't wait to see another one from you!!! ñ_ñ

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